20 Funny Replies to “Do You Come Here Often?”

When someone approaches you with the classic pickup line, “Do you come here often?” it’s an opportunity to inject some humor and light-heartedness into the conversation.

Instead of giving a predictable response, consider using one of these witty and amusing comebacks.

In this article, we’ll explore 20 funny replies to this common question, providing examples and context for each to ensure you can charm your way through any encounter.

1. “Only on days that end in ‘y.'”

Use Case 1: At a local bar or club where you’re a regular.

Use Case 2: When meeting someone at a casual gathering or social event.

Responding with “Only on days that end in ‘y'” is a playful way to acknowledge the frequency of your visits while showing a sense of humor. It works well in casual settings where lighthearted banter is appreciated.

2. “Actually, I just got lost on the way to the grocery store.”

Use Case 1: In a new city or town, when you’re genuinely unfamiliar with the place.

Use Case 2: When you want to break the ice and make the other person laugh.

This response adds a twist to the typical question by humorously suggesting that you stumbled into the venue by accident. It can be especially effective if you’re trying to make a connection with someone you’ve just met.

3. “No, I’m an undercover critic, reviewing their food.”

Use Case 1: At a restaurant or cafe where you’re enjoying a meal.

Use Case 2: When you want to playfully tease someone who’s using a cheesy pickup line.

This reply is a fun way to acknowledge your presence while poking fun at the pickup line. It’s best used in a restaurant or similar setting, where it’s clear that you’re enjoying the establishment’s offerings.

4. “I’m here so often that I’ve considered getting my mail delivered here.”

Use Case 1: In your favorite coffee shop or hangout spot.

Use Case 2: When you’re chatting with someone who’s familiar with your regular visits.

This humorous response conveys a sense of familiarity with the place, making it suitable for locations where you genuinely frequent. It can spark a playful conversation about your favorite spots in the area.

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5. “Yes, I have a reserved seat with my name on it.”

Use Case 1: At a local pub or sports bar where you’re known by the staff.

Use Case 2: When you want to emphasize your regular patronage.

This reply is ideal for situations where you’re a well-known customer. It adds a humorous twist to the idea of being a regular, making it clear that you’re comfortable in the environment.

6. “I come here so often; I should be on the payroll!”

Use Case 1: In a friendly, relaxed atmosphere like a neighborhood diner.

Use Case 2: When you want to establish a rapport with someone who works at the establishment.

This response implies that your frequent visits should warrant some sort of compensation. It can be used to lighten the mood when talking to staff or fellow patrons at a local hangout.

7. “I practically live here during happy hour.”

Use Case 1: At a bar or lounge known for its happy hour specials.

Use Case 2: When discussing favorite times to visit the venue.

This reply is perfect for situations where you enjoy visiting during happy hour. It highlights your enthusiasm for the venue and can lead to a conversation about your favorite drinks or deals.

8. “I’m here more often than the Wi-Fi signal.”

Use Case 1: In a coffee shop or co-working space with public Wi-Fi.

Use Case 2: When making light of your frequent visits in a tech-savvy setting.

This response adds a touch of tech humor by comparing your presence to the reliability of the Wi-Fi signal. It’s suitable for venues where people commonly use digital devices.

9. “I’m the mayor here on Foursquare.”

Use Case 1: In a setting where people are familiar with location-based social media.

Use Case 2: When joking about your online presence at the venue.

This witty comeback references the now-defunct Foursquare app, humorously implying that you’re a frequent visitor both in real life and virtually. It’s perfect for tech-savvy individuals who appreciate social media humor.

10. “I’m a professional ‘here-comer.'”

Use Case 1: In a playful, flirtatious interaction.

Use Case 2: When you want to convey a sense of confidence and humor.

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This response adds a touch of professionalism to the question, playfully suggesting that you’re an expert at frequenting the place. It can create a fun dynamic in a lighthearted conversation.

11. “You could say I’m the resident party animal.”

Use Case 1: At a party or club event where you’re known for your energetic presence.

Use Case 2: When introducing yourself in a social setting.

This response is ideal for situations where you’re known for your lively personality. It can serve as an icebreaker and open the door for more conversation about your social escapades.

12. “I’m here so often; they’re considering naming a menu item after me.”

Use Case 1: In a restaurant where you’re a frequent customer.

Use Case 2: When you want to make a memorable impression on someone.

This humorous reply suggests that you’ve made such an impact on the venue that they might immortalize you on their menu. It’s perfect for casual, friendly banter.

13. “I practically have a VIP parking spot out front.”

Use Case 1: In a setting with ample parking where you often visit.

Use Case 2: When making light of your frequent visits.

This response playfully exaggerates your regular patronage by joking about having a VIP parking spot. It’s suitable for locations with parking facilities.

14. “I’m here so often; I should apply for citizenship.”

Use Case 1: In a foreign country when visiting a favorite local spot.

Use Case 2: When chatting with a fellow traveler about your favorite destinations.

This humorous reply is perfect for travelers who’ve fallen in love with a particular foreign locale and want to convey their strong attachment to it.

15. “I’m a permanent fixture in this establishment.”

Use Case 1: When you’re a regular at a local gym or fitness studio.

Use Case 2: When joking about your dedication to a healthy lifestyle.

This response suggests that you’ve become an integral part of the place due to your frequent visits, making it ideal for fitness enthusiasts.

16. “I come here so often; I should get my mail delivered.”

Use Case 1: At your favorite bookstore or library.

Use Case 2: When discussing your love for reading and the venue.

This response humorously conveys your deep connection to the place, implying that you practically live there. It’s great for bookworms and library lovers.

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17. “I’m the unofficial mascot of this place.”

Use Case 1: In a casual, friendly gathering where everyone knows each other.

Use Case 2: When emphasizing your close-knit relationship with a group of friends.

This reply playfully suggests that you’re an integral part of the group, serving as its mascot. It works well when you’re with a close-knit social circle.

18. “I’ve been here so much; I’m considering redecorating.”

Use Case 1: In a setting where you have a strong presence, such as a coworking space.

Use Case 2: When discussing your involvement in a community or organization.

This humorous response implies that you’ve had such an impact on the place that you’re thinking of redecorating it. It’s suitable for those who play an active role in a community or organization.

19. “I’m here so often; I should be on the payroll.”

Use Case 1: In a workplace or office where you’re known for your dedication.

Use Case 2: When joking about your commitment to your job.

This response humorously suggests that your frequent presence in the workplace should earn you a salary. It can create a light-hearted atmosphere among colleagues.

20. “I come here often enough to have my own theme song.”

Use Case 1: In a music venue or karaoke bar.

Use Case 2: When discussing your love for music and the venue’s ambiance.

This playful response implies that you’re so connected to the music venue that you should have your own theme song. It’s a great choice for music enthusiasts or karaoke lovers.

In conclusion, when faced with the age-old question, “Do you come here often?” you now have a repertoire of witty responses at your disposal.

These responses, delivered with the right tone and context, can add humor and charm to your interactions and help you stand out in social situations.

Remember, the key to a successful comeback is to keep it light-hearted, playful, and suited to the setting.

So, next time someone asks you this question, don’t hesitate to unleash your sense of humor and leave a memorable impression!